Happy Meal Ages Well

A McDonald's Happy Meal, after one year on the shelf: Happy Birthday Dear Happy Meal.

I purchased a Happy Meal, not to eat, but to observe and blog about. Yes, I bought a Happy Meal and then placed it on my office shelf, right behind me and my computer. It sat on my shelf for a year as a silent witness to our fast food industry.

It smelled delicious for a few days. I'd get a whiff of those yummy French fries every time I walked into my office. After a week or so, you could hardly smell it.

After one year:

My Happy Meal is one year old today and it looks pretty good. It NEVER smelled bad. The food did NOT decompose. It did NOT get moldy, at all.

Because Colorado has an arid climate, over the year the moisture has been slowly pulled from the Happy Meal. The bread is crusty and if you look closely, you will see a crack across the top. The hamburger has shrunk a bit and still resembles a hockey puck. Yet, the French fries look yummy enough to eat. I never had an odor problem, after a couple of weeks, I couldn't even smell the fries.

(via The Consumerist)

Spelling Reform

Endorsed by Theodore Roosevelt: Simplified Spelling Board.

The Simplified Spelling Board was an American organization created in 1906 to reform the spelling of the English language, making it simpler and easier to learn, and eliminating many of its inconsistencies.

The Board's initial list of 300 words was published on April 1, 1906. Much of the list included words ending with -ed changed to end -t ("addressed", "caressed", "missed", "possessed" and "wished", becoming "addresst", "carest", "mist", "possest" and "wisht", respectively).

Other changes included removal of silent letters ("catalogue" to "catalog"), changing -re endings to -er ("calibre" and "sabre" to "caliber" and "saber"), changing "ough" to "o" to represent the long vowel sound in the new words altho, tho and thoro, and changes to represent the "z" sound with that letter, where "s" had been used ("brasen" and "surprise" becoming "brazen" and "surprize").

Everett True didn't like it.

U.S. As One Neighborhood

I don't know the original source of this, and I haven't even verified it.

There are about 300,000,000 of us in the USA, spread out over 3,794,101 square miles. But let's say we all wanted to live in one state together comfortably. Using the density of Brooklyn, NY as an example: at about 35,000 people to a square mile...

What state would we all fit into?

(via Bifurcated Rivets)

St. Patrick’s Day Is Today

I just realized that today is St. Patrick's Day. So I changed that blue bar to green. Kind of festive, eh? That's how I celebrate. How about you?

I hope I remember to change it back.

Birther-Related Legislation

Hawaii is considering a law to ignore Obama "birthers".

Birthers beware: Hawaii may start ignoring your repeated requests for proof that President Barack Obama was born here.

As the state continues to receive e-mails seeking Obama's birth certificate, the state House Judiciary Committee heard a bill Tuesday permitting government officials to ignore people who won't give up.

"Sometimes we may be dealing with a cohort of people who believe lack of evidence is evidence of a conspiracy," said Lorrin Kim, chief of the Hawaii Department of Health's Office of Planning, Policy and Program Development.

How much of a problem is it?

The state still gets between 10 and 20 e-mails seeking verification of Obama's birth each week, most of them from outside Hawaii, Kim said Tuesday.

A few of these requesters continue to pepper the Health Department with the same letters seeking the same information, even after they're told state law bars release of a certified birth certificate to anyone who does not have a tangible interest. Responding wastes time and money, Kim said.

(Thanks Onecos)

Toilet Tank Lid As Weapon

In Iowa: Woman hit sister with toilet lid.

Police arrested an Iowa City woman after she allegedly struck her sister with the lid of a toilet tank.

Johnson's sister and her sister's husband told police that Johnson, who had been living with them for the past two months, removed the toilet tank lid and struck the her sister during an altercation. Police said they found the sister lying on the floor bleeding from her foot. She also had an injury to one of her fingers.

Shown here is a random toilet tank lid.

Blood Bath

Now you can re-enact the shower scene from Psycho: Bloody Bath Mat

Matching shower curtain sold separately.

(via Foolish Gadgets)

R&R Hall Of Fame

One of the most exciting days of the year is when they induct new members into the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame. This year was no exception. Congratulations to:

• Abba
• Genesis
• Jimmy Cliff
• The Hollies
• The Stooges

I always considered the Stooges to be more of a slapstick comedy act. But that shows what I know.

Pepsi Leaving Schools

Soft drink news: Pepsi is dropping out of schools worldwide by 2012.

PepsiCo on Tuesday announced plans to voluntarily remove high-calorie sweetened drinks from schools for kids up to age 18 in more than 200 countries by 2012. Coke and Pepsi agreed to stop selling sugary drinks in U.S. schools in 2006.

Coke announced this month it won't sell sugared drinks in primary schools worldwide unless asked, but it is not matching Pepsi's move for high schools. "We believe school authorities should have the right to choose what is best for their schools," says spokeswoman Crystal Warwell Walker.

To make up for the lost sales, expect Pepsi For Dogs.

Retirement Places

Topping the list of Business Week's America's Best Affordable Places to Retire...

No. 1 - Tucson
Cost of living index: 109.44
Sunny days: 284

Tucson, home of the University of Arizona, is a scenic, affordable place to retire. It is surrounded by mountains and the dry beauty of the Sonoran desert. It has its own airport, just six miles from downtown Tucson, more than 100 parks, a good public transportation system, and plenty of public and private golf courses. The university and University Medical Center are among of the state's largest employers.

Methodology:

Working with Cyberhomes.com, an Irvine (Calif.) home valuations and listings Web site owned by Lender Processing Services (LPS), BusinessWeek.com came up with some places to consider. We looked at Zip Codes with heavy concentrations of affluent seniors (or residents nearing retirement age) because we figured these would be beautiful, fun, and convenient. We then heavily factored in cost of living and-to a lesser extent-sunny days, home price projections, and proximity to hospitals, golf courses, and other amenities.

44 Days Of Card Playing

Joker's wild: Architect spends 44 days creating world's biggest house of cards.

An American architect has broken his own Guinness World Record by building the largest house of free-standing playing cards.

Bryan Berg used 218,792 cards to create a replica of the Venetian Macau, which is on display in its namesake luxury hotel and casino.

Berg took 44 days and 4,051 decks of cards to complete his model inside the Venetian, which sits at the heart of Macau's Cotai Strip, the China-ruled city's version of Las Vegas' neon alley.

Yo Jonco

I could send an email, but I know Jonco (the Bits & Pieces guy) reads this blog.

I'll be in St. Louis next month. Maybe KLAW can arrange a little get-together? We arrive on Wed-April-14, and leave on Sun-April-18.

Maybe you can show up riding on this?

Then we can have a few beers, eat some of that St. Louis pizza in KLAW's underground bar, and compare notes. Maybe you'll reveal some blogging secrets that explain this chart:

Parting Comment

Yesterday, a commenter who goes by the name of bdn2004 got upset because I deleted one of his comments that was completely off-topic. He left another comment which I also deleted. But I saved a copy because it's probably the best comment he has ever made. Here it is:

The first mistake I made was ever reading this blog in the first place. I take that back. The first mistake I made was buying a book by the author of this blog.

He made a comment a couple of weeks ago that he thinks of himself as a nice guy. That is in the eye of the beholder isn't it? I don't think he is a nice guy/person at all. I find him full of vile and hatred towards the more than 50% of the people who call themselves Christians, Republicans or think any different than him. Those who belittle are little as they say - but he can never help himself. You would make a good Communist. They are right. You are wrong. End of story. 

This comment will be bleeped anyway...so I'll let it fly. I mentioned I may buy another one of your books. I wouldn't buy another one of your books if it were leather bound, autographed, cost $.01, was hand delivered, and came with a personal tutor.

And another thing...the banjo is the sorriest instrument ever devised.

Cheap Dental Equipment

In Massachusetts: Dentist used paper clips in root canals.

A former Massachusetts dentist is accused of putting paper clips in patients' mouths during root canals, then billing Medicaid for the stainless steel posts he should have used.

The state attorney general announced Tuesday that a grand jury indicted former Fall River dentist Michael Clair last week on charges including assault and battery, larceny, submitting false claims to Medicaid and illegally prescribing prescription drugs.

Sounds like a business opportunity for Orly Taitz.

Everett True And The Plumber - Part II

Here's Everett's response to the plumber's bill:

I asked for guesses about what Everett would do. Wendy! came pretty close:

I think Everett True will teach that thimblerigger a thing or two about frenzied finance and pounce upon him in that bathtub that has just been fixed. He will give that porch climber such a thrashing his pipe wrench will be spinning! That prop lifter will never try to water a bill again!